October 12, 2016.

SPOOKTOBER STORY #6:

You think: "these kettle-crisped salt-and-vinegar chips are delightfully piquant!" You look around the break room, searching for a friendly face for which to deliver your review of the kettle-crisped salt-and-vinegar chips, but the small space is devoid of any coworkers at all. The microwave hums, its glass turntable slightly offkilter, emitting a squeak at every three-quarter interval.

The break room has been vacant but for yourself and your kettle-crisped salt-and-vinegar chips for the past ten minutes, what's in the microwave that would require longer than ten minutes to heat? And which of your absent coworkers would have deemed it necessary to evacuate the break room as their food warmed?

You stand, feeling sluggish. The kettle-crisped salt-and-vinegar chips sit as a clump in the pit of your gut, no longer delightfully piquant. You sniff the air: the now surely superheated contents of the microwave emit no noticeable odor, but the room smells organic, old, dusty. The timer doesn't display a time, rather the word POPCORN, blinking on and off in a rhythm that feels slightly nauseating.

You flatten your dress against your thighs, and realize your hands have gone clammy. The wad of soggy, masticated kettle-crisped salt-and-vinegar chips in your stomach turns over like an elephant seal rolling in its own waste. You take a step towards the microwave, squinting, but the window is clogged with old foodsplatter, impossible to see through.

The timer now reads PIQUANT.

The microwave turntable squeaks sound like a mewling kitten, its leg caught on a nail, dehydrated and terrified and dying. You clutch your stomach, the clod of chewed up, moistened kettle-crisped salt-and-vinegar chips working its way back up your esophagus slowly, deliberately, on its elbows and stomach, climbing through your body with purpose, malice, with hate in its soggy heart, hate towards you, you chewer, you devourer, you, you, you, you reach out your hand to open the microwave door

PIQUANT
PIQUANT
PIQUANT
PIQUANT
PIQUANT
PIQUANT
PIQUANT