October 13, 2023.

"No, mother, he's real, you've got to believe me! Jenny and Bobby didn’t just get into an accident, like the newspapers said, they were chainsaw teethed to death! We all saw him on the stage at the midterm dance. The kids at school are all calling him Chainsaw Teeth Man."

“The Chainsaw Teeth Man? Why, I’ve never heard such ridiculous nonsense.”

“That’s what they’re calling him! I know you think it was just a dream, but we saw him, we saw him! I swear we did!”

"Stephanie, that's absurd, there's no such thing as Chainsaw Teeth Man. You're just upset that your friends were chainsaw teethed to death, I understand, but this happens all the time here in Harrowing Grove, it’s upsetting, but these things just happen at your age. Now, don't you have homework to do?"

"Like I can focus on homework when Chainsaw Teeth Man is running around chainsaw teething all my friends!"

"Oh, Stephanie, what am I going to do with you? Wait until your father gets home, he’s been sheriff for twenty years in this little burg, he can set you straight.”

“Just think about it, mother, Jenny and Bobby couldn’t have just gotten chainsaw teethed by accident. How do you even fall into a mouth of chainsaw teeth? They must have been chainsaw teethed on purpose!”

“They were just drinking at the midterm dance and fell into some chainsaw teeth because of their own recklessness, and it wouldn’t surprise me one bit, knowing Jenny’s mother, and that’s all I’m going to say about that!”

“Mother!”

“Now if you won’t listen to me, being chainsaw teethed to death will be the least of your worries! To your room, miss, and I won’t hear any back talk!”

"Oh, Mother, what will it take for you to believe me! The Chainsaw Teeth Man is real! And you're going to regret saying he's not!"